Sweet and Innocent

I know, you're looking at the title for this entry and probably cracking up.  A girl that's into the kink lifestyle, worked as an escort, and all of that be sweet and innocent?  It's totally impossible!

The truth is I'm not such a bad girl and a deviant as many people seem to think.  I'm not this dark girl with this sick and twisted mind.  I don't have wild fantasies every night.  I'm not intensely sexual.  I'm actually not that sexual at all, not usually.  In comparison to most people I know, I'm pretty knowledgeable, but also pretty prudish.  It's not so much that I'm sheltered.  I simply not that kind of a person.

You know how there's all these jokes about women who say they never masturbate and in truth they probably do.  Men seem to think that women do it almost as frequently as they do.  Honestly, I wouldn't know.  I know no one would ever believe me on this, but I don't.  I've heard the whole thing of, "How can you expect anyone to want to be with you if you don't even want to be with you."  In my case, I'd like to think that doesn't apply.  I'm not largely driven by sex and probably never will be.  In most cases I could care less about sex.  If it happens and it's good, yes, that's great.  Otherwise?  I really could care less.

What about all the other stuff?  I'll be honest, half the time when someone is talking about this or that, I generally don't know what they're talking about.  Yeah, I smile and laugh with everyone else.  I pretend to get it.  I'm just too afraid to humiliate myself by asking about something everyone else seems to get.  I don't make crude jokes for that reason too.  I don't get in on crass conversations.  I tend to tune out conversations that relate to that kind  of thing.  In the grand scheme of things, I'm not at all the deviant that people think.

Will anyone believe this?  I can't entirely be certain.  All I know is I am what I am, whatever that may be, and appearances can be very deceiving.